After a break up is it possible to be friends

Figure out your new normal. While you're apart, figure out how your new life is going to look. Time once filled with being with your significant other now has to be filled with something else.

Find ways to make your life joyful, from spending time with good friends to picking up a hobby like painting or rock climbing. It doesn't matter what you do, you just need to figure out new habits, so you don't slip into old ones with your ex.

Take care of yourself. Letting go is a grieving process, and that's fine. However, you need to make sure you are still taking care of yourself and your health. Try to sleep on a schedule, and eat well. If you're feeling down, treat yourself to something fun, such as a nice dinner, a pedicure, or a ticket to a basketball game. Part 2. Let the past stay in the past. While it may be tempting to rehash old arguments, once you're friends, it's time to let it go.

You don't have a right to criticize how he spends his time or how she likes to dress. Be supportive, and try not to move into old patterns of criticism. Talk through your feelings with the other person and then try your best to move on. Think about how it was before. That is, if you were friends before you got together, think about how you interacted then.

That can help you forge ahead with a new relationship. Move slowly. Don't jump into going out three times a week. Stick with a couple a times a month at first. Too much too quickly could force the friendship to break apart. Pick your meet-ups wisely. If you try to do the same things you always did as a couple, you're likely to find it awkward. You associate those places with the romantic side of the relationship, and you're trying to create a different type of relationship.

Therefore, it's best to pick new things to do together, especially things that won't leave you alone together. Skip the intimate conversations.

You don't have the same conversations with a lover that you do with a friend. We set up our ex to disappoint us, and we set ourselves up to be angry, hurt or disappointed should our expectations not pan out. Instead, revisit an old hobby , make plans with loved ones or volunteer with an organization you care about to keep you feeling connected.

News U. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism. Special Projects Highline. HuffPost Personal Video Horoscopes. Follow Us. Terms Privacy Policy. Part of HuffPost Relationships. There are usually just too many confusing feelings at play to make that transition a quick and easy one. In our case, my ex and I took a short breather to let the dust settle a bit after our breakup. After a few weeks of being apart, we realized that we really liked one another and just wanted to be in each other's lives as just friends.

Ultimately, we learned that we were much better friends than romantic partners. I definitely don't regret the relationship, because the friendship that came after it has meant so much to me in the years that followed. Honestly, I wish all breakups were more like that one. Is that possible? Is there a way to turn all your former lovers into future besties? Our hair changes from spring blonde to autumnal grey. And sometimes, even the most solid relationships come to an end. Nothing in life is constant, including our desires and perspective.

As we mature we sometimes see things in a different light and realize that we have started following a different path than we had expected. This can happen in all facets of life, but one of the saddest is when you start to realize that your relationship is not turning out to be the happily ever after you dreamed of. The reality is that sometimes love can change.

While some people prefer to make a clean break after a long relationship, others prefer to remain friends and talk and even visit with one another regularly.

Here are some guidelines to help steer you in the right direction if you decide to remain friends after a break up. Is there a future? What do you both want that future to look like?